nextdoor.com is a good website
I wasn't on it even though I got an invitation to join some time ago. Now I signed up and see that its really useful about notifying people around you.

Everything is like a nightmare ((

Most likely, she didn't make it even thru the first night. I remember how cold it was when I was looking for her, I had to go home to put on my winter boots as my feet got wet and cold and had to make a hot drink to warm up.

We'll probably never know what happened. But we can always hope that she made it to a safe place, and is with someone who will take good care of her.

I wonder how long birds remember (and miss) their mate.

Most of them will eventually get used to the changed situation, but I don't know how long they remember. It might be forever.

I play the same picture in my head and can't get rid of it: How I get into the yard close to where she flew right after she escaped, she can see and hear me from there and she flies to me.
For some reasons, two males (Trillie and TaterTot) have been aggressive towards each other since we have this situation. I am not sure who starts first. Maybe it's just how Trillie reacts to stress. Other birds don't seem to care.

Trillie must be very upset so he's probably acting out. He might be actually starting the fights, or he might be doing something to provoke Tater Tot into fighting with him.

If I could, I would disappear from the Earth surface (but I won't). Having other birds doesn't help the situation, it makes it worse.

It's natural to feel sorry when something bad happens, especially if it was something that could have been prevented. But it's not possible to anticipate every possible problem and stop it from happening. Accidents happen and mistakes are made. That's just the nature of life. All we can do is promise ourselves that we'll try to do better in the future, and move forward.

Accidents happen we can't change them just look
to the good times you had with your bird...
It will do you know good dwelling, on what if.....
I don't mean to sound harsh.... but your negativity
Will be picked up by your animals.....
Look forward......not back.....
Good luck