My birds are a soap opera. I have three breeding pairs and everything else is a dysfunctional relationship in one way or another. Some birds are in love with an inappropriate mate and there are two who aren't attached to anyone. Squeebis is in love with his sister, Henry is in love with his mother, Elvis is in love with Pip's mate, and Snowy and Mims are in love with Vlad who can't figure out how to mate. Frodo and Priscilla aren't attached to anyone, although Priscilla has been flirting with Elvis. I could have more breeding pairs if some of them would give up on their hopeless relationship and move on to a more suitable mate.

I try to limit the breeders to one clutch a year but Shodu is hard to stop. She often produces a second clutch, and I let her do it.

Love this description, Carolyn.

I am concerned for Trillie. He doesn't seem to be eating much, and he sleeps a lot. I understand this is probably his way to cope with stress, but I'd like to make sure that this doesn't go too far...

I was concerned that he was sleeping so much, so I rushed to the store and got his favorite crackers (I was out) then I held the bowl next to him and he ate some. I also held a millet spray for him, he ate a little bit. Then small water bowl.

If things come to worse and he makes me seriously concerned, would it work to completely change his environment so that his self preservation kicks in? I mean, maybe placing him in a totally different environment (another home preferably with a strange female cockatiel bird and a nice owner)? I am already thinking in extreme way... or would it have an opposite effect and won't do any good? I am already asking our bird store about good cockatiel owners who may be interested to help...

Those of you who pray, please pray for all of us.

Moving Trillie to a new environment right now would probably make it harder on him. Right now he has lost his mate but still has the rest of his flock and the home that he's used to. If you take him somewhere else he will lose that too.

It's likely that he wouldn't be receptive to a new female right now. He's still missing his old mate. He will get over that but it will take some time. I don't know how long but I would guess at least a couple of months before he's ready to start over with a different hen.

thanks, I was just concerned that he decided to starve himself to death

Is this possible?

I observed that yes, Trillie sometimes initiates fight with Tator Tot when they just sitting (acting out as you said). But I also noticed that when Trillie (now rarely) comes to eat, some birds try to block him from food. I have lots of food in literally 5 or 6 places. But Trillie has never been super intelligent. Cuddles would always find a place where she can eat without competition and Trillie would join, now he only knows the most popular place.

Its very hard not to have the bird I could pick up at any time

He's not likely to starve himself to death, but keep an eye on him to make sure he's getting enough to eat. If you hold a piece of millet spray in your hand, will he eat it?

this is what I did today, Got scared to see him always sleeping and held a bowl with crushed crackers and then millet spray. He ate some.

Should millet be fed in moderation or is it not a problem to feed almost unlimited millets to birds. usually I give them one huge piece of millet spray for a day

Millet is the base of a lot of budgie and cockatiel seed mixes so I wouldn't worry about feeding too much if you're concerned he's not eating enough

As for your situation, you shouldn't feel bad. I bred a lot of beautiful budgies over the last couple of years and I did keep the majority of the chicks. I shouldn't have. I had the space! But it just made the flock grow to exactly that, a flock. I took the budgie flight down last year to build a new heated outdoor bird room for the larger breeders and the indoor/outdoor flight I had put the budgies in was no longer accommodating the flocks needs. I decided to rehome all but 10! of the budgie flock to a friend of mine who has an absolutely enormous flight. It has been wonderful seeing them thriving there. He could offer that many birds a lot more than I could. I also made the decision to rehome a few peach faced lovebirds a couple of years back. I had them in a flock together but there was so much drama (as in murders!) and I felt it was time for them to go to a breeder who had an established flock where they wouldn't be top dog. The aviary was enormous and beautiful, stuffed with enrichment. I couldn't complain at all. I get photo updates. I love seeing them all in there. I am now trying to breed species that may perhaps be easier to sell or more desirable. Not so much to me. Budgies have always been my favourites to breed but if I am to keep the birds that I do I need them to ideally pay for themselves

You do what you feel you have to do to keep your birds happy and your own stress levels down. You have a lot on your plate and you certainly shouldn't feel guilty for that. The animal people who call folk out on not caring for something for the rest of it's life are selfish. They obviously haven't been in that situation where life has thrown something at them!

Good luck with your decision and all the best. I hope things slow down for you