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 Post subject: Re: Well <insert choice expletive here>.
PostPosted: Thu Sep 03, 2015 1:47 pm 
Quaker
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Name: Stephanie
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If you need anything, you can talk with me any time.



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 Post subject: Re: Well <insert choice expletive here>.
PostPosted: Thu Sep 03, 2015 3:38 pm 
Cockatiel
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I am not a skilled speaker, but I was thinking of you guys yesterday and today. I am sending to your whole family any sympathy I can offer.. How's your son?

Rest in peace, Cyrus. Binky free (don't know if I can say this for the cat, but why not)



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Cuddles and Trillie (cockatiel parents) and their 8 children
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 Post subject: Re: Well <insert choice expletive here>.
PostPosted: Thu Sep 03, 2015 3:49 pm 
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I'm sorry that you've lost him. But it sounds like his passing was as peaceful and easy as something like this could ever possibly be, and I hope you can take comfort in knowing that he was able to leave this world gently and feeling happy.



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 Post subject: Re: Well <insert choice expletive here>.
PostPosted: Thu Sep 03, 2015 4:12 pm 
Parrotlet
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Thanks, guys. Carolyn, I absolutely do take comfort in knowing he passed peacefully and before he got to the point of terrible pain.

Chipper, as most kids do, he is adjusting quickly. He was sad when we told him last night that the vet would be coming today and then again when I picked him up from school. A few minutes later he started talking about his happy memories of Syrus and wanting to make a little memorial for him. Now he's working on his homework like no big whoop.

I remember when my grandma died and I was the age my son is now. I understood what it meant and I cried but I was able to process it really quickly and move on from it. He's doing the same thing and I'm glad for it.

I'm still a mess though, of course. Ugh!


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 Post subject: Re: Well <insert choice expletive here>.
PostPosted: Thu Sep 03, 2015 6:46 pm 
Cockatiel
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When Chipper got missing, my daughter had a pretty bad reaction. From time to time she had a meltdown saying she wanted him NOW NOW NOW and then she almost hit her head on the wall ! at first she wanted his pictures everywhere, but as time passed she removed them all and told she didn't want any mentioning of him (which was sad for me, but I understood why she wanted it this way)
Of course, there is a huge difference when you know where your pet is, and when you don't. But maybe with time the difference vanishes, as your pet is just "not with you"

Last year one woman was killed in my city when airplane fell on the building she worked in. We knew her family rather well. She has a 10 yo daughter and her older daughter is 22. I would say that the way they both processed her death (thru the Faith in God) is amazing! Her 10 yo is now back to a very happy girl (sometimes I can't even believe it). I am atheist too and I even envy them! After this event I thought that maybe we should start attending church and everything. But it's hard when you don't truly believe.



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 Post subject: Re: Well <insert choice expletive here>.
PostPosted: Thu Sep 03, 2015 7:33 pm 
Quaker
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Cloudy, it sucks to lose someone we're close to. I am not good with saying comforting things that I come up with by myself. Instead, I find myself repeating used cliche condolences, but I really mean them when I say them. Sometimes, you just need time to wrap yourself around it emotionally. When Jail Bird died I was upset, but I kind of knew it was coming, so I had time to prepare myself. When Teak died out of nowhere, I was a mess. But with anything, it all passes. There are lots of ways to make his passing more comfortable to you. Remembering all the happy times you had together is a great start. Keep a few of his pictures in the photo album if you ever want to see him once more. And above all, just keep on keeping on. Everything works out in the end. :hug:



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 Post subject: Re: Well <insert choice expletive here>.
PostPosted: Thu Sep 03, 2015 8:05 pm 
Parrotlet
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Thanks everyone, your words mean a lot, they really do.


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 Post subject: Re: Well <insert choice expletive here>.
PostPosted: Thu Sep 03, 2015 8:09 pm 
Lovebird
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It's amazing how kids can adjust well to that... I'm glad your son is taking it well. :)

I'll be honest, I'm not good with condolences either. That's why I've refrained from replying to this thread. I do care, but I never know what to say, and I apologize for that. I will let you know, that I do care, and I truly am sorry for your loss. Our animals are part of our families, and so it truly is tragic when they pass.



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 Post subject: Re: Well <insert choice expletive here>.
PostPosted: Thu Sep 03, 2015 8:22 pm 
Parrotlet
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In my professional life, I've had to learn about giving condolences and I still find it difficult. I'm still awkward at it. Honestly, it just means a lot to me that you all are reading and posting. It sort of feels like you're sharing this little journey with me. So thanks again! It's nice to not feel like a nutso because I'm just going on and on and on and on about this. I figure if I keep vomiting all this feelings BS, I will eventually feel better and I'll be able to let it go.


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 Post subject: Re: Well <insert choice expletive here>.
PostPosted: Thu Sep 03, 2015 8:31 pm 
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Name: Carolyn
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I've only had to have an animal put to sleep once (a budgie, 16 years ago) and in my experience the loss is hardest when you have to make the decision instead of having it just happen naturally. It's the right thing to do and the only decent choice you could have made, but it's so terribly hard to make that choice and carry through with it. It makes the loss more traumatic when you have to play an active role in bringing it about. It's going to take time to get over this, but you were brave enough to do what was best for him.



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