Oh man, I have yet to have a student like that, but I did have one who asked me, on the last day of the semester, if there was anything she could do to bring her 6% up to a passing grade. Then she proceeded to write a long (supposedly anonymous, but I could totally tell because of the details she included) rant on my evaluation about how unfair my grading policies were.
I glanced at Brandon's forum the other day and saw that he's trying to breed his birds for real. Also, one of them flew off in the park, but was somehow rescued AGAIN. One of these days his luck's going to run out, and I feel awful for the birds.